this is wierd

it needs to be said that, i am bothered that me and jessica arent friends anymore.

forgiveness

I have to try real hard to think that anyone would miss me if i were gone.


meanwhile,
my insecurities are ripping us to shreds. we have no backbone and i'm filling you up with anger and frustration. i don't want to hurt the one boy i have ever loved but thats what you get for dealing with a selfish suicidal B.

I love you

"lies and bullshit
and bullshit and lies
you'd think i'd give up
after so many tries
but my finger's on the trigger
and my eyes are on the prize"

I'm sick

very very sick.

sick

I just remembered!

this isn't in the order you think it's in

1. Your self confidence makes me want to puke, and even though we dont talk very much anymore i wonder if its wrong of me to think that i should be the one to tell you that "your not attractive, and making me or anyone else feel less like it is just a waste. you make yourself look dumb".

2. I dont see you anymore. I dont want to see or talk to you anymore. I dont need to write this nice 'i miss you' paragraph when in reality it all really boiled down to this: "she's too busy shooting up". wrong choice of words asshole.

3. I'm afraid to leave you. If i leave, or you lose me than i feel like no one will be there. your beautiful. your a star. your dance moves brighten every one of my bad days. dont leave even when you really really want to.

4. He's a scumbag, and you deserve only the best. i know it seems like i'm jealous or just being a straight up bitch but you need to know i just care beyond the level i should be caring. KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU KNOW.

5. Your one of the best things i've ever had. When god handed me you, i knew that it was going to be the best and the worst and too much all at the same time. I was right and these months have felt like years but in the best way possible. If i had wishes unlimited it would be to continue to make you the happiest you've ever been. everything will get better. hold onto me.

6. I'm glad you didnt leave me. even when i was a monster bitch you were here and aware of what it was that was going on. you take me in and out and try to cure the disease i cannot rid. your probably one of the best friends i've ever had because truth is you know it just as well as i do.

p.s.
i'll make it up to you

7. You've always been there and you will continue to be there. I can't explain in words how much you mean to me. sisters for life and til death do us part. your the best twin anyone could ask for.


I dont think anyone else deserves one

let's sleep til' the sun burns out

Never caught my breath
Every second I'm without you I'm a mess
Ever know each other
Trust these words are stones
why cuts aren't healing
Learning how to love

In and out we go and hide from how we feel. I'm confused and I shouldn't be. These dreams are getting thicker in length. blank screens and tears fall, but when will OUR curtain finally fall?



As long as you're alive
Here I am
I promise I will take you there

As long as you're alive
Here I am
I promise I will take you there

Won't you think I'm pretty
When I'm standing top the bright lit city
And I'll take your hand and pick you up
And keep you there so you can see it
So long as you're alive and care
I promise I will take you there
So long as you're alive and care
I promise I will take you there

So here I am it's in my hands
And I'll savor every moment of this
So here I am alive at last
And I'll savor every moment of this
Savor every moment of this
Savor every moment of this